Psychologically preparing our kids

I homeschool my 15 yr. old son. We are very close, and he is my only son. He's a very religious boy, and rather a computer geek. He has asthma, and knows the risk to him involved with even a common cold, much less a killer flu the likes of this one. 

Concerning the bird flu and our prepping, I tell him like it is. No sugar coating and hiding our heads in the sand, and no blind panic, either.  Still, even without hysteria in my voice, the facts are scary enough. I worry about what he's thinking.  15 yr. old boys, even though we are close, are not known for discussing their feelings.  He knows that his asthma puts him at risk, and he knows the mortality rate as of now for this flu is........I cannot find the words............shocking? horrifying? 

Any ideas on anything I can say or do? What are those of you with children saying and doing to help your kids of any age?

Marzinn, my one and only is a grown adult.  I have no experience with this to share.

I do not envy you.

I have a 3 year old son, so I am at the other end of all this. I think it is good that you have been honest with him. Kids know when you are hiding something. Why don't you have him participate in some of the tasks of preparing. That might lessen some of the anxiety he could be feeling.

Cupcake Mom -- do you have any ideas? Others of you? -- Libby

Thanks, Nikita.

He's going to need his faith when/if this hits as he is at greater risk due to his asthma. Not that this flu cares whether you have weak lungs or not. It kills, without a pre existing medical condition.  I guess it would be easier if you had a child who was too young to know or care what is happening, but for us moms of older kids......it is heartbreaking to have your kids see you  buy masks, stockpile food and.....buy weapons for self defense. It is a burden for us adults to carry, and more so for our children who are old enough to know what may happen.  It all  just breaks a parent's heart.

marzinn, I have children from 9 to 16 at home and i have treated the different ages a little differently-  my 16 year old daughter knows all the facts, she has a teacher at school that is concerned too, so she is as informed as i am,  and i have had her help me purchase preps and do research on different vitamins and foods that will build up our immunities right now.  that way, even though she is getting the bad news, she is able to feel like we are doing all we can to be prepared and that makes her feel safer.  the other kids i have given more general information to- but they also know all about the preps i have in place and the fact that i will keep them home when i feel it is time.   i think that as long as your son knows that his mom is doing everything in her power to keep him safe he will be ok.  i do think that he should be given all the information he wants at that age-  i think that not knowing the facts and worrying about them would be more stressful. for him. 

Also make sure he knows that he has plenty of asthma medicine on hand too,and put it in aplace where he can find it and check on it easily if he wants.  i spent a year suffering from a pnumonia, asthma and broncheitis and i know how important it was to have that inhaler in arms reach all the time.   i hope this helps you- hang in there-just the fact that you have worried about his thoughts on this tells me that he is in good care

 

I give my 10 year old limited information, but she knows what's going on, she knows about the bird flu and that we may have to stay at home for awhile, but I haven't talked to her about the long term effects and don't want to alarm her more than necessary. I think with an older child you could be truthful, (as a a former counselor to adolescents, 15 years in social work) they usually pick up on any tension/problems with family members anyway, better to be honest with them so they know what's going on and are just not left wondering.

My BF awareness buttons will arrive this week. The kids helped me with getting them made. They will wear one and they are giving a bumper sticker to grandma and grandpa. My daughter asked if grandma knew about bird flu.

Children will ask what they need to satisfy them. Just let him know you are prepared  and make sure you keep communication open with him. Since hes old enough to gather info on the internet make sure hes able to disern fact from fiction.

I think it will be tougher for the toddlers; how do you make them keep a mask on???  Because they don't understand the seriousness...they'll be taking off the respirator every chance they get.  A constant battle to keep them safe...

Nikita, maybe you could have your toddler practice wearing a mask now  just as a game. He could think it's a superhero costume and so it could be something he looks foward to putting on in a time of need and not a strange and unfamiliar item. Have him color it with markers and older kids can draw a pictures of themselves wearing one. If it is worst case senario they will probably be home almost all of the time anyway. Journaling through written word or pictures is very helpful to kids who are too young to express themselves verbally and even great for teens who just don't want to share but do need an emotional outlet. Stock up on lots of paper, markers and journals with lined paper. My now college age son never seemed to listen when I pointed out some blurb on the news but it really does sink in and they do take it with them sometimes more than you know. You have to be very careful to give kids age appropriate info and only info they can use (like handwashing) to make them feel empowered and not overburdened. It is a parents job to do the worrying for them. They will definitely sense your tension anyway no need to pile more on top of it. Take care to limit adult conversation to adults only, kids will be listening even when you think they're not.

nikita, i work with three year olds and you are right about them wanting to take the masks off.  What we have been doing in our class is giving them lessons on keeping germs away-  we have taught them all to cough into their elbows. wash their hands like a doctor (both sides) and we have even made a picture book on germs.  We will be doing a lesson of occupations, and are trying to get them each a little mask to wear for doctor day.  They do seem to understand, and after all of them being sick with colds and strep early this fall, theyare tired of being sick too.

Toddlers with masks?  Kids with masks?  I'm missing something here.  Although I believe it's a good idea to have masks on hand for young kids, I don't see where they will be using them.  I see adults needing them to go out of their secure quarantine area for whatever reason, but why would toddlers need masks?  If quarantine is done at home why put a mask on a kid?  This isn't chemical warfare or anthrax...it's influenza and it's not going to come in and get you unless you bring it in to your house or allow an outside source to bring it in.  So...what's with masks on toddlers?  Not trying to be a jerk, I'm just not seeing the necessity in that.  Help me understand...

Nikita wrote: I think it will be tougher for the toddlers; how do you make them keep a mask on???  Because they don't understand the seriousness...they'll be taking off the respirator every chance they get.  A constant battle to keep them safe...

 

If the time comes, you will do whatever is neccesary to keep your toddlers mask on: even if it means restraing thier hands and listening to them scream: eventually they will get used to it, or you will give up and let them take the chance of getting sick, dying and sickening you all.  What seems like an inconceivable action now will be a matter of life or death later and I don't think you will find the choices so hard then.  Especially if you prepare yourself psychologically for it now.

Our hardest battles will not be with H5N1 - it will be with ourselves.

 

Dave wrote: Bannor...good points.  I could see some of those situations happening.  Maybe I was looking too critical at the posts.  I just hope there is no one out there planning on masking kids 24/7 in basic quarantine.  Thanks for the post.

No Sweat.  I just went over my mask inventory: I started prepping 5 months ago and was sure I had "hundreds" of masks to cover my family and my parents, plus the fact that I almost certainly will have some community contact, plus I have some office staff I was looking to give some basic protection.

My actual count?

50.

That was before all the implications and implications of implications and implications of that started to set in.  I have just ordered more to get my mask inventory  in more realistic plus fantasy numbers.   The main thing is that, since masks will become almost nonexistent once this starts and, you can't be sure when they will be available again, or how long this will last, you have to prep like you are going to need quite a few of them. At least that's my thinking.

 

Someone with a medical background can comment on the following.
I understand that Versed (midazolam HCI) is very effective in eliminating
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brandy are not contraindicated.



http://www.theberries.ns.ca/Archives/conscious_sedation.html

"Midazolam is one of the newer agents available with a
potency between lorazepam and diazepam. It can be given SC, IM or IV. In
certain situations it may also be given PO although one will not find that
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http://www.theberries.ns.ca/Archives/conscious_sedation.html

Edited by Rick

I posted something on my website that may help all of us talk to our children about the Bird Flu: http://www.killerflu.net/what_to_say_to_kids_about_bird_flu it also has a link at the top to Brainpop's Avian Flu video for children.

Not a fun thing to bring up to our children. I was just open and honest.

Article to read:

Talking to Children About A Bird Flu Pandemic